Monthly Archives: August 2017

The Evolution of the TIE Fighter

Sienar Fleet Systems is one of the most successful starfighter engineering companies, rivaling Kuat Drive Yards (Slave 1, Jedi Starfighter, most star destroyers) and the Correllian Engineering Corps (Millennium Falcon, other freighters and civilian ships). But despite the company’s success, it was never well-known, largely thanks to Palps and his Empire. The company was Imperialized and ordered to build only one line of fighters: the TIEs. The result is a long line of models and variants used by the Empire and later the First Order. This is list every one of those in the official canon universe.

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Imperial TIE Fighter: The ship that started it all, the TIE/ln space superiority starfighter. It has powerful, agile twin ion engines, and it’s the standard fighter in the Imperial fleet. It has no one speciality, and it’s used for just about anything from recon and routine patrol to dogfights and skirmishes to all-out fleet battles.

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TIE Bomber: The TIE/sa bomber is a modified version of the galactic standard TIE fighter, specialized for areal bombardment and general destruction. It’s heavy armor and bulkiness cost speed and maneuverability, so it usually requires an escort squadron, but its firepower and bombing capabilities rival that of a republic Y-wing.

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TIE Advanced Prototype: The Grand Inquisitor’s personal fighter has speed and firepower beyond that of ordinary TIEs. It also has life support and air circulation for flying without a suit, and basic shields to replace heavy armoring. It was the first prototype in a line of improved TIEs that were not mass produced, and reserved exclusively for the Imperial elite.

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TIE Advanced X1: Other than the prototype, this is the first non-mass produced TIE fighter. A combination of heavy firepower, strong shields, powerful sublights, and a capable hyperdrive make it an ideal choice for high ranking Imperials–or even Sith lords. Darth Vader made it his chosen ride and jumped in to hunt some rebels during the Battle of Yavin.

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TIE Interceptor: The TIE/IN is a real force to be reckoned with. It is reserved for Imperial pilots who have survived twenty or more combat missions. While the fighter has no hyperdrive or shields, its outstanding speed and maneuverability compensate the disadvantages. This variant has one simple purpose: to engage and destroy rebel starfighters. It has four laser canons on its wingtips like that allow it to match an X-wing and two more on the sides, speed to rival an A-wing, and firepower capable of taking out a Y-wing with shields up.

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TIE Defender: This was the first mass-produced fighter in the TIE line that was engineered for quality. Its development was ordered by Grand Admiral Thrawn, who saw the error in the standard TIEs. The Defenders are equipped with shield generators, and have three wings instead of two to provide space for six laser canons and missile launchers. Had they replaced standard TIEs, the rebellion would have been stomped out before it could be created.

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TIE Striker: This new Imperial variant, the TIE/sk x1 experimental superiority fighter, is a sleek, fast ship designed for in-atmosphere missions. Needless to say it has no hyperdrive, though it is capable of operation in vacuum. Its large central pod is also useful for cargo transport, and its missile launchers are designed for bombardment.

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TIE Reaper: An upgrade to the Striker, the Reaper is a large in-atmosphere troop transport. Director Orson Krennic used one of these to take him and his death troopers to the surface of Scarif during the rebel invasion. This is one of the only known appearances of the ship.

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First Order TIE Fighter: After the Empire’s fall and the rise of the New Republic, Thrawn’s ideas began to resurface. The First Order manufactured a new line of TIEs, equipped with shields and improved laser canons. They are flown by two troopers: a pilot and a gunner. Being more expensive, stronger, and faster than previous fighters, this is the first truly formidable ship in the TIE line.

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First Order Special Forces TIE Fighter: The standard TIE/fo was the first step to making pilots into valuable assets instead of disposable resources, something not even the Republic considered. This is a level up even from that. The Special Forces version is outfitted with a strong hyperdrive, improved lasers and shields, and a warhead launcher. Like the Imperial TIE Interceptor, only the most experienced and successful pilots can fly one of these ships.

 

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TIE Silencer: This is Kylo Ren’s personal starfighter. While there is only one official picture of the ship, one picture says a lot. It looks like a cross between an upgraded Interceptor and an Advanced. It looks big enough for a hyperdrive and shields, and maybe missile launchers. It has four laser canons on its wings, which gives it the versatility to rival an X-wing. The tinted cockpit has no apparent function, but it looks cool. The question remains: will it live up to its looks? Is this the best personal starfighter in nine movies and nine seasons?

5 Common Myths About Zombies

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The generic stereotypical zombie is a slow, rotting, drooling, mindless shell of a human with a desire for the consumption of brains to make up for their own lack thereof, with the “off button” being the destruction or detachment of their head. But there are many other kinds, and when — not if — the apocalypse happens, the odds of dealing with the standardized Hollywood walker are unlikely. These are five of the most common myths about “real” zombies and why they are wrong.

They eat brains. This one is somewhat obvious. When a person’s brain degrades so far that they become cannibalistic animal-like beasts, they attack to kill, and they don’t care what body part they are chewing on. If they are simply reprogrammed or repurposed by a substance or disease, eating brains is the last thing they would do.

They’re rotting. While it makes sense that a senseless creature would not have the sense to keep up a sensible appearance, it’s unlikely that a human could walk around with their guts hanging out of their stomach. To some degree they are probably filthy, but not rotting.

They make noise. “Brraaaiinnsss!” Hollywood walkers tend to make a distinct moaning sound almost constantly. While this may be a side effect of the brain damage/changes, it’s fairly unlikely, and would serve no purpose.

They’re slow. Wrong wrong wrong wrong. The only reason for a zombie to be slow is for the hero to get away, and that only happens on TV. There is no purpose for a slow zombie and nothing to hold it back from a full sprint.

A headshot kills them. This is not wrong in every situation, but it is not a reliable fact. For starters, the headless chicken effect probably applies for instinctive, impulsive, mindless creatures, and headless zombies are still dangerous. From another perspective, because some types of zombies have their brain activity reduced to the most primitive parts, even a clean shot through the head can miss the area that needs to be shut down. Many of these parts are located near the center of the head, which is a tough target from long range.

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The Flash vs. Yoda

For this battle I’m matching up the 2014 TV show’s Earth-1 Scarlet Speedster and Yoda in Revenge of the Sith, since that’s where he really reached his best.

Weapons: Barry Allen has a lot of stuff up his sleeve. He can run really fast, for starters. But the Speedforce also gives him phasing, fast thinking, lightening bolts and in the right circumstances time travel. Yoda is stuck with the Force and a lightsaber. He has Force-speed, but he won’t outrun the Flash.

Defenses/weakness: Yoda’s lightsaber and the Force are his only defenses, and Barry has only his speed and the suit. The Flash’s main weakness is compassion. He’s willing to sacrifice himself to save others at any chance he gets. Yoda wouldn’t hurt anyone else unless there is no other way, so that weakness is negligible. Yoda refuses to wear armor or a suit and so is exposed to stray fire and explosions, but that doesn’t appear to hinder him. He doesn’t have any other weaknesses.

Skill: By season 3, Barry has enough refined control of his speed to take on any evil speedster that shows up. Yoda’s lightsaber techniques and Force powers are unmatched by anyone other than the Emperor. The tiebreaker is that Yoda has 900 years of experience to back him up.

Mindset/intentions: Yoda has no pleasure in killing the Flash, but he will do what he must, as he did when he was fighting Emperor. Whatever reason Barry has for taking on Yoda, he will do whatever it takes to defeat him, though like Yoda, he wouldn’t kill his enemy if he didn’t have to.

Use of surroundings: The Flash is better at this. Yoda has a defensive fighting style that focuses more on spins and swings and jumps.

Because both of these are “good guys,” neither would try to exploit the others weaknesses by harming anyone else, so the fight would be straightforward. Yoda’s fast lightsaber spinning would be a challenge to get through, but eventually the Flash will find a gap and disarm Yoda. It’s possible that Yoda would go offensive and throw Barry around with the Force. That is how most people defeat Barry, so it’s a good place to start. Or he would create a Force shield that prevents Barry from running at him, and deflect his lightening bolts. Either way, the Flash would probably run around in circles and create time remnants of himself. He would take on Yoda from every angle at once, forcing him to retreat. Yoda could defend himself but won’t be able to kill the Flash.

Theoretically, if the Flash doesn’t make any mistakes, Yoda couldn’t stop him with brute force (pun intended). But mind tricks work on almost anyone, and humans are very susceptible. Yoda is never seen using mind tricks, but if Obi-Wan could pull it off, so can Yoda. Given an opportunity, he could send Barry running home to rethink his life, convince him that he’s fighting the wrong person, or just make him lie down and give up. The fight would be long and hard, but the Speed-force is no match for the Force.